I set off on my journey to Victoria to deliver my first interstate training course at 11:30 am. Sitting on the plane I was running through all the things that could cause me concern being out of reach of home base, on a strange bike and a group of 14 riders of varied skills.
"What could possibly go wrong?" I thought sarcastically.
The plan was that my two partners in crime at the other end (Steve and Cameron) would have organised all the logistical things like permission and access to the training venue, Firewood, Water, Toilets etc. All I had to do was land, get picked up at 2:30-300pm 'ish and have a quick look around the venue to pick locations for each of the techniques and have a few quiet beers with the early birds, hit the sack and get up Saturday morning and deliver the course.
"Too easy" I thought to myself confidently.
Little was I to know that Murphy was in my luggage and was himself scheming up all manner of things as we flew through the air at 30,000 ft!
The flight was good, I had an eclectic supply of Blues from the pre-CD era and a comfy seat. In no time I was clearing my ears by holding my nose and trying to blow out as we descended into Melbourne airport. Disembarked and collected my luggage, made a B line to the nearest Coffee vendor and acquired a double shot flat white and sat down in the arrival area to mellow out.
I turned my phone back to online and immediately there was a flood of SMS's come in, nothing unusual there! I worked my way through them and got to one from Cam that he sent at 11:46 am (just after I boarded the plane in Brisvegas.) ".....Sorry, having car problems, won't be able to pick you up, will contact Steve, stand by for further info..... " Or words to that effect. OK, No problems, I always like a little downtime and rarely organise it for myself. I usually wait for the universe to do that for me and this was one of those occasions. More coffee, a bit of a walk, 3:00pm came and went and by 4:00 I thought I had better get some food, so I pinched a trolley that someone had left lying around and slung my 23 Kg bag onto it and 'made revolutions' toward the McDonalds over near the BP servo'.
As I sat down to eat my Macca's It was about 5:00pm and I was getting a little concerned as I knew Steve was towing a caravan with 3 bikes in it and his wife was riding the 'Mother Ship' that he was lending me and he would have been miles away in the other direction by the time Cam called him. It was looking like rain and Friday afternoon traffic was....welll... Friday afternoon traffic!!! The phone rang, it was Steve. He was very apologetic and I said it was fine, I had shelter and coffee so not to worry. He was about 1/2 and hour away. I said I would meet him where I was but he was going to call me 10 minutes out. I ate my dinner and thought that it would be easier to stop and pick me up with a caravan from in front of the terminal so I hoofed it back over there. I stood waiting for a while and Steve called again asking where I was and I said back over at the terminal. They had gone to Maccas so he came over past the terminal and so did Liz on the Coponord!! Steve and I shook hands and he said that it would be a good idea for me to get some time on the bike so I could ride from there to Strath Ck! I agreed but was thinking that riding a strange bike in the rain through Friday traffic into the kangawallfoxes in the dark was probably a bit ambitious. However I did not want Liz to have to ride it either so I then shot off to the Disabled loo's in the terminal to unpack my riding gear and get changed. I was wearing shorts and a T shirt as I was planing to sit in a nice warm cab of a Hilux all the way there. I got a TXT from cam at about 5:45pm that said, "Still waiting on a hire car, see you there".
I let Steve know that Cam had contacted me and he updated me on the situation, Cam had had the fuel pump in the Hilux die and was trying to get a loan car or repair from Toyota, good luck with that mate!! I jumped on the Coponord and we zoomed of into the gloom, literally. We were heading in a generally northerly direction and I could see the rain falling in the east, I hoped the we would not head straight into it and for a while we did not. The levers on the Coponord were all set for seated riding in street gear and changing gears was a little tricky in my MX boots!. It was very big and felt heavier than an 1100GS! It was quite powerful as the engine is a detuned RSV 1000 motor so it was not lacking there and the brakes were nice. It was shod with Tourances or Anakees so grip was good too. I managed to make friends with the gear lever and the fairing was very effective, I was having quite a nice time sitting at CRV towing a 1 1/2 ton caravan speed. That was until we turned east and headed straight into the rain. It was a light spray and I was probably getting more off the road via the traffic than from the heavens but it was not the way intended spending the setting sun hours of the day.
We had a pretty good run out to Strath Ck and the rain really did not hit, we followed it most of the way and I was pretty dry by the time we got there. Through the third gate and across the flat cow paddock, watching the pats, grass and puddles appear from under the van we finally got to camp. Steve stopped and I did the same. Ben and Marty had arrived before us and had set up camp. We made our introductions and had a quick chat. We walked around and familiarised ourselves with the area, chose a spot for the fire and then the van and tents. Steve got in the CRV and proceeded to position the van in the chosen spot which was only 10m or so away. I turned and walked to my tent site with the tent Steve had thrown me out of the car and as I did I heard an almighty crash!! I spun around and saw nothing to explain the noise until I got closer to the van and I notices that the right side of the van was sitting on the chassis rail on the ground!! I walked around to the wheel and had a closer look and found that it had gone down into the biggest Wombat hole have seen in some time. The tyre was not even on the ground, spring hung down at full stretch, axle on the deck as was the right side chassis rail from front to back!!
<Insert appropriate expletives here>... Steve and I looked at each other and agreed that Murphy was with us and it looks like neither of us had consumed the required volume of green beer last St Patrick Day! We sat down and considered our options. We had at our disposal a number of block of wood not used by the previous campers, about 8 inches in diameter and varied in 12 to 18 inches in length, some pine board that were used to put under the jockey wheel and stabiliser jacks to prevent then sinking into the ground, the stock scissor jack from the CRV, a tyre lever and that was about it. Liz and Steve set about removing all weight they could in the form of furniture and the bikes, camping gear etc. After that we planned to use the scissor jack under the rear bumper of the trailer which was an extension of the chassis and the jockey wheel to lift the wheel and van as high as we could, chock that and put a block under the jack and repeat. Eventually getting the tyre off the ground enough to stuff some rock and or logs under to allow us to dive (pull) the van out. About 2 iterations and 45 minutes into this plan we soon saw that we were not going to get the result we wanted. However we had lifted the chassis about 4-6 inches off the ground and that would be enough to get the jack under and lift the chassis directly next to the axle. That should get us there. another half an hour later we had managed to get the right wheel high enough in the hole to put one of the larger logs under it and a couple of smaller ones plus a piece of pine board 8 inches square on top of that. We let it down onto that and wound up the jockey wheel ready for the first attempt at moving over an hour. It was nearly 9:00pm and we were running out of time patience and humour. To our pleasure the CRV pulled the van out first go and we were all starting to taste a cold beer and a counter meal at the Strath Ck pub.
After some mundane wood chopping and tent erecting, we arrived at the pub and promptly ordered a few cold beers and asked about meals.
"Too late" was the polite but short reply!
"Mumble, mumble, groan, groan, etc"
"We can do anything deep fried" slurred the publican who was well into happy hour.
"What would that be we asked" keen to accept anything he offered
"Fish and Chips" he retorted
"Fine" we said in unison, paid out money and sat down to drink until food arrived.
A short while later he emerged from the kitchen with meals in hand a a rather disturbing "Crazy Clown' mask on. My immediate thoughts were;
"Do I realy want to eat seafood prepared by a drunk bar manager in the middle of country Victoria when I am going to spend the weekend miles from anywhere including phone coverage if I got sick"?
I told my common sense to but out and shut up. I was soar tired and very hungry and I had top teach in the morning without coffee or breakfast as Cam had not arrived with the requisite equipment! I ate quietly in the knowledge that I would not be the only one sick and there is safety in numbers. It was good and I did not get sick. A few cleansing ales watch Steve get beaten at pool by his 12 yo had me thinking of bed. We all agreed it was time and slunk back to camp to build the fire up, talk a little shit and hit the sack. It was about 10:30pm
The dull glow of dawn illuminated the aqua green fly of the tent and I knew it was time to get up, get dressed, stoke the fire and start welcoming the troops as they arrived. I did not look but it was about out 6:00am. I had to head down the track to the bitumen and put some signs out, I managed top get a few on as we came in yesterday but they were only paper and the dew would have had them fold over on themselves like exhausted soldiers, so I best freshen them up. As I did the last one on the bitumen turnoff, Voodsy flew by and hooked around and came back. Greetings were exchanged and I said
"Follow the signs"
Thinking that some may have come through earlier and not seen them I headed into Strath Ck (about 10km) and found another group at the General Store/Servo. Since I was there I ordered a coffee to go and had a quick chat to Tinman, Jane, Roadkill etc. The coffee was great and gave me the kick I needed, we took off back to camp and found everyone that was coming had turned up. More greetings and salutations were exchanged and the day began in earnest.
While everyone settled in and unloaded their bikes I though I would go out and see how the Coponord likes wet cow paddock!! I started a large circle and counterbalanced the beast. It seemed OK but I was not sure if the feedback I was getting was 'good' or 'not so good' or 'your close to going down!' I tightened the radius a little and soon found out that the feedback I was getting was "Danger Will Robinson, Danger" The big girl gracefully spun the back wheel up and the back went out and we both went down. Nice and steady, I just stepped off and let her lay down.
"Take one" I muttered to myself
Not one to give up easily I gave it another go but I assumed that the result would be much the same. I was sporting a couple of cracked ribs from a get-off a few weeks ago on the Condamine River Rd and they were stinging a bit from picking the her up once!. Pretty much the same result but as she started to look at me funny I eased off and did a few laps but as I was tearing the grass up it was not long before al the torque found a way out and she gracefully lay down much like a camel after a big day on the sand! Again I stepped of and caught my balance, picked her up and parked her up.
Time to start the day so I rallied the group around for a little speech from our friends at legal and we headed out onto the paddock for the first exercise. Thankfully Ben (Autostream) was there and he did the demo's for me. Everyone was getting into it and the day progressed smoothly even though the weather was not co-operating to begin with.
They day went by pretty well with everyone picking up on the key points quickly and getting their technique sorted. The day warmed up and fined up toward lunch and we were keeping good time. Those of us who needed to stock up headed into strath Ck for lunch and came back to the crowd around the fire. Steve got the chainsaw out and wipped up some firewood for the night and to keep the fire burning for the day.
Highlight of Saturday evening was a run out to the State forest where we were hoping to use some of the softer track but had been turned to mush by the showers. A few keen folk headed down Red Track into the slosh, those of us with more 'discretion' stayed and listened to the commotion. There was much reving and yelling, starting and stopping until finally a couple of them came back up the hill which by now was very greasy. All standing and handling it well until Steve and Liz's daughter (12yo mind you) came up around the corner with the little TTR125 full noise with one hand on the bars the other punching the air. It was Gold but happened to quiclyk to get a shot off. Nice one Bronny!
Day 2 is always a bit more fun and Sunday was a classic VIC day with all possible combinations of sun, wind rain and rainbows and that was only over breakfast but it did settle down and turned out to be a great day as we started putting some of the techniques learned on day1 into context. We ventured over to another paddock which had a dry creek bed and some fallen limbs. We punted around through the creek bed, learning how to stay neutral on the bike and use momentum to get up the other side not just power. Kylie even got some air coming out of the gully on the Xcountry, well done my dear! We moved on to jumping erosion ruts and small logs. Hytram does well with the big Kato, PrestonPaul equally at home on the 640A, he quite liked the log jumping as did Roadkill. After a few laps everyone was jumping and getting a little air with the front and some both wheels.
Our dynamic dual duo Tinman and Jane on 650 XChallenge and 650 XCountry and Roadkill and Kylie on (You guessed it) 650 XChallenge and 650 XCountry, all taking to it like ducks to water. Kylie was a stand-out as she has stepped up from a scooter to a DRZ 250 and then to the big 650. Well done my girl. Jane was right at home on the yellow beast and showed her experience and some aggressions. Go Girl. The boys were having a ball on the tall torquey XChallenges.
Gany showed excellent form on the big F800, throwing it around like it was a much smaller machine. Had the front locked up on that thing for a good metre and a half on a couple of occasions. Likewise Voodsy was showing he had the best of the DR650, did very well on the braking exercises, nice job.
In the arvo, those that needed to get away packed up and said their farewells, a few of us will be catching up at the OCR later in the year. The rest headed up into the hills again onto a little stretch of road with a good thick layer of blue metal on hard packed roadbase to practice getting over the jitters heading down this surface and around a few bends. Jane and Liz were particularly interested in getting this monkey off their back so we spent 45 minutes breaking the exercise down into small manageable pieces. After that time Liz was much more comfortable and looking for more of a challenge.
Beautiful country!!
After we got back to the camp the balance of the group loaded up and said hooroo. Headed off into the sunset to get back into the real world. Steve, Liz, Bronny and I had a little while to soak up the serenity as we packed the bikes up and loaded the caravan and the car. Eventually like all things, the weekend had come to an end so we set of through the gates for the last time and made revolutions for the Airport. The rest of the arvo was shuffling along like sheep in the crush down t the metropolis and a quick disabled toilet shower for me so I could sit on the plane in close proximity with others without causing nausea!!
Special thanks to Steve and family for their great efforts in the weeks leading up to the course and on the weekend. Also to Ben for helping me 'herd the cats' and lending me some pain killers and the all important coffee on Sunday morning. Thank for your input and doing the Demo's for me. I would have been truly lost without the efforts of you all.
The End
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